`one step closer {{garrett

[Alyssa Compton]

I AM AWARE NOW, HOW EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE FINE

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too late, i am in hell[/CENTER]
Something was always said about drowned silence, the way it carelessly rolled off the waves of the oceans and slithered into your brain streams numbing your senses. Perhaps it was something like that—something as peaceful as silence was tearing her apart and breaking the once strong, independent woman—she had previously known herself as. Silence had been her worst enemy, her deepest darkest nightmare coming to life—had come in the form of silence—Alyssa just couldn’t stand it anymore. A shiver running down her spine, she walked through the cold Chicago streets, wearing nothing but a light jacket—with nothing shielding her from the impenetrable coldness. Unlike most people, the harshly cold weather didn’t affect her as badly as it should have, maybe it was because of the hot tears that were continuously cascading down her cheeks, and perhaps it was just the little fact that today—she had gone to City Hall to request for Divorce Papers.

The crumbling of every single wall she had built was crumbling down—she was empty, alone, and defenseless to this cold world. She had nothing protecting her anymore—she was gone along with the wind, with nothing to keep her steady in life. Her hands were shaking at her sides, shivers becoming that much more shaky as she walked—it felt like a heat wave inside her body, but she was shivering—everything was going wrong—nothing was right anymore. A soft fog of breath escaping her lips, she pushed herself harder through the freshly fallen snow, feeling the wet tingling sensation touch the bottom of her legs, clearly her jeans were probably soaked with snow.

This city had once been her home and now, if she would allow herself to go through with the task at hand—it would once again be her home; but was she truly ready to let go of the man she had loved and cherished for over ten years? He had been the only thing she knew for so long—loved with all her heart—and now, it came to this. He had allowed another woman into his mind—a woman so vile and cruel, the disgustingly thin pale woman who had gloated about seducing her husband. Alyssa was never a violent person—but at that moment, she had wanted to do nothing more than to tear the woman to bits. As much as it killed her for her to hear about her husband cheating—she was glad she did—that would have been better than living such a dreadful lie.

A part of her knew that if she had never found out about the other woman—Nikos would have never told her—during the past year, he hardly even spoke to her anymore—it had always been about sex—maybe that had been a clue about how much he was changing. The man he had been back when they were still in school was gone—there were so sweet words of “I love you” or kisses goodbye anymore. The only thing she felt from him recently had been coldness—and now Alyssa knew why. Every single bit of her hated herself for throwing this relationship away, but could she really allow herself to be with a man who had been inside another woman, after promising his life eternally to her? No, because no matter what the circumstance was—she would never do that to him. There is simply no excuse for that kind of behavior.

Another sigh escaped her lips, and she ran her left hand through her smooth hair—the diamond of her ring catching a few strands of hair, Alyssa pulled her hand back roughly, and shoved it into the pockets of her jeans once more. Anything that reminded her of Nikos was killing her at the moment, and no matter how much she wanted to—she still couldn’t make herself take off the thing he had given her five years ago on the day of their marriage. Everything in her life was shattering into bits and Alyssa couldn’t stop it—she could if she wanted to, but why would she stay with a man who had committed the horrible crime of infidelity on her. A tear rolling down her cheek, Alyssa hastily wiped it off—not wanting to cry anymore, she had done enough of that for years—anymore crying and she would break down in the middle of the street.

Her footsteps coming to a standstill after a few minutes of walking, Alyssa found herself looking up at a tall building—that undoubtedly looked like a large church. Somewhere along the background—Alyssa heard the soft tunes of carols nearby, and without wanting to, a soft smile crossed her lips as she envisioned children singing carols. It was supposed to be Christmas time, a time for family and friends, yet—here she was in the most happiest time of the year—more miserable than she had ever been before. Alyssa wasn’t ready to let go of a life that Nikos and her had built together—she wanted her Christmas being in his arms, wrapped around a cozy blanket near the flashing lights of the Christmas tree. She remembered how much he adored Christmas—it was probably his favorite time of year—and no matter how harsh he was at work—all of that faded away for just that one moment in the year—and he was her Nikos again—loving her exactly as he had done before.

Countless of tears were falling freely from her face- cascading down one by one; she didn’t want to be seen crying in the middle of the street, so without stopping to pause, Alyssa walked up the stone steps of the church and pulled the door open. At once the rush of warmth touched her face and skin—making her automatically step inside the glorious heat. Her cheeks were red with coldness and the cold tears ran along her cheeks. The warmth did nothing to comfort her—neither did the protection from the coldness—if there was one thing that drew her closer was the bright floating lights of the candles. Her footsteps as quite as she could make them, she walked near the fourth row of the church and took a seat on the edge knowing full well that she didn’t belong there. Alyssa had never been a believer of religion—and Nikos had quite been the same; besides getting married in a Chruch—she didn’t think she had ever stepped in one. Was that the reason her life was completely broken? Perhaps—maybe it was just a big combination of everything in life she took for granted. Maybe it was fate getting her back for being so careless and carefree.

The church was empty, not something that she had expected three days before Christmas—but alas, she was happy that it was, for she couldn’t be around galleons of people, especially now that she was less than a wreck. Her mind once again found its way toward Nikos again, and she wondered what he was doing at the moment—was he off with that other girl? Or was he too mourning for her like she was for him? What hurt her the most was the fact that Nikos was alone—alone at this time a year. The time he had looked forward to more than anything—him without her—it just didn’t sound right in her ears. Alyssa still wondered if she had done the right thing--- if she pushed herself hard enough—maybe she could allow herself to forget his blunder—after all, could she really throw away those beautiful ten years of her life?

MUSE: BEAUTIFUL
WORD COUNT: 1387
LISTENING TO: CLOSER TO LOVE - MAT KEARNEY
CREDITS: LYRICS FROM FINE AGAIN BY SEETHER; TEMPLATE BY EMMA.

[/blockquote][/blockquote]

[Garrett Reynolds]

Walking through the streets of Chicago, a place where the wind blew feriously and the snows poured in relentlessy off of Lake Michigan. Especially this time of year where the chilled winds brought the temperatures well below freezing but this was something Garrett didn't mind for Christmas was here. Even with the snow falling silently to the ground creating a beauty that was unforesaken for months, tugging on his jacket to hold in the heat of his body, which was just a small reminder that he was truly alive and even if his world came crashing down a few weeks ago. Listening to the silence of his footsteps crunching against the softness of the fresh snow. His dark eyes floated along the bussle of the city streets as people walked faster searching for there last minute Christmas gifts for there loved ones. Garrett always loved this time of the year, even with the recent drama and grief that becomd instowed upon his family. Yet there there was something to be said about how his parents where handling the pain, for his intution showed goodness coming there way which just warmed his heart.

Continuing walking down the street towards St. Sebastian's church, a place he found himself wondering towards more and more since his sister's death. Being raised a Catholic, having to go to church every Sunday growing up and once he left the house, he just stopped going except for Christmas Eve Mass. For the serenity that was felt during the church on those nights was breath taking, even as a student at Loyola University studying English, he found himself being lured into those masses. Recently it seemed he was going every other day, now his mind fitted to Elizabeth and how she unfortunatly got caught up in one of those wrong place, wrong time. For it was late at night and she was returning home from class when a drunk driver slide on a patch of black ice right into the oncoming lane and before she had time to react. Her small car was not match for the Dodge Ram and she was killed on impact, two weeks to the day. Taking a gulp of air, he ran his tongue along his teeth as he found himself at the base of church, making himself stop thinking of Elizabeth and everything that happened that day.

In a few weeks, he was suppose to have a meeting with his editors which was something he managed to push aside and since his success was high, Tom, his agent, managed to talk with them and explain everything of what had happened. For they pushed the meeting until after the holidays. That was something that surprised him to this day, here he was twenty-five years of age with the number one best selling romance authors on the market and it all started when his best friend handed his maniscript to Penguin Group and they instantly loved it. At first they pushed him to use his real name but that wasn't something he wanted, for the publicity and the fame was nothing he desired. Writing to him was just something to do for he loved it, nothing more was needed. Racking his fingers through his brown hair, he made his way into the church. Upon entrance he made his blessings with the Holy Father, Mother Mary, and the Holy Spirte with the holy water provided.

Letting his brown eyes roam the church he noted it was pretty empty which surprised him. Taking a deep breath in, Garrett walked further in where he noted a girl with brown locks that were wet with snow sitting there with a certain sadness lingering on her features that seemed to mask his own feelings. Moving his way in the fourth pew, as he gently sat next to the girl. Garrett removed his brown jacket revealing a blue sweatshirt and gray shirt underneath, setting the jacket across his lap. His eyes glanced over, as the words spewed softly enough for her to hear, "Are you okay?" His gaze was gentle and warm, yet it portaryed his own sadness. For this world was strange and unsual and he didn't want to push for if she didn't want to talk he would go back to his own thoughts.

[Alyssa Compton]

I AM AWARE NOW, HOW EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE FINE

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too late, i am in hell[/CENTER]
Signs—so many different signs lingered about the world, guiding people when they were torn and completely broken. Here she was in the middle of an old church—sitting in the center waiting for a solace of sorts—maybe a sign. Alyssa didn’t exactly know why she was here, was it to get away from the frigid cold of the winter air in Chicago or just seek a place for guidance. The smell of wax and burning fire rubbed against her nostrils—the smell of Chruch had never pleased her—often she disliked anything to do with religion—and it was daftly amusing how the person who despised religion had found herself seeking out a church. Maybe this exemplified the magnitude of her pain—the high amount of suffering that was pounding against her head and heart. There were so many choices to make, decisions to choose from—yet, even with all of those heavy and untamable burdens hanging on her shoulder, she still had not one idea of what she was going to do.

Alyssa and her mom had been relatively close—since last week, when she finally moved out of her home, she had been talking to her mother non-stop. The pain that echoed through her heart as she restlessly packed her bags were horrible — the tears that ran through her eyes and the dry sobs that echoed around the room were just maddening. Just the sight of Nikos had disgusted her after she found out what he did, disgusted her. The thought of spending another minute with him was more than disgusting. She couldn’t look him in the eye knowing what he did, and he had no right to apologize for it—because she knew Nikos would have done it on his free will, full well knowing the consequences of what he did. Her heart was in pieces, shattered completely beyond recognition; many things in life she would have believed to happen, but never did she expect her and Nikos to ever get a divorce. They had been together for so long; the sweetest couple anyone had ever seen, yet—here they were separated—not yet divorced. Her mind still refused to accept the word “divorce”, it was just too hard to envision her life without her rock.

Sighing softly to herself and leaning her head against the back of the row in front of her—she just closed her eyes for a minute, taking in the depressing silent that the church emitted—needless to say she found nothing comforting about it—if anything, it made her headache that much worse. Clenching her fists against her sides, she prayed with all her might, at least that’s what she thought she was doing. Her eyes were furrowed in concentration and she was only wishing one thing—all she wanted was a sign of some sorts—telling her what to do—something to tell her whether or not she was making the right decision by divorcing Nikos—by throwing away ten years of her life with a sign of a paper. So many insecurities rattled through her mind—so many of them pounding away at her heart—blinding her for decades and ages—what would happen after the divorce? Would she ever find someone she loved as much as Nikos? Would she ever fall into a real relationship once again? After all, if a ten year relationship had the ability to go down the drain—what’s to say any kind of relationship had a chance at survival. The way she looked at it—was that every relationship was doomed from the beginning, her and Nikos were proof of that.

Her eyes still closed she smelled the air—which still smelled of melted candles and wax—she wondered what would happen once she opened her eyes—maybe this thick layer of protection she had over her heart would shatter into a million pieces again. Maybe she would just envision an invisible picture of Nikos standing there in front of her—Alyssa was afraid of opening her eyes—of remembering all those precious moments that she had with her husband. Biting down upon her lips she forced herself to open her eyes—and thankfully no sudden memories attacked her—instead she was granted with the spacious view of the church. So many times she had taken this place for granted, never once bothering to look around and study the true magnificence of this wondrous place. The high arched windows, the golden ash colour, and the beautiful orchestra on the side of the statue of Jesus Christ.

Truly the church was breath-taking, being here all alone scared her—it was only three days before Christmas—surely more people would be in the church—or was everyone becoming as selfless and independent as she was—forgetting about the little things that gave so many people hope. Her head bowing down—Alyssa felt the tears leave her eyes as she prayed again—her hands intertwined in front of her as she whispered silently to herself. It was probably years since she last prayed—the last time being—three years ago—when Nikos had been severely injured at work—and it didn’t take much to see how horrible and selfish she was. Alyssa seemed like a leecher—only coming into the soft mellowing heavens of church when she needed it most—it was horrible; like the million other people like her—she took the advantage of this beautiful ray of comfort.

Perhaps days had gone by or maybe hours—she didn’t know, but Alyssa had been routed to her seat for so long—she had completely forgotten about the realms of time—or anything else. Her five senses were all dimming down and nothing seemed to be working inside her brain. She was a woman confused about what she wanted or needed—there was nothing coming for her—nothing coming to guide her. It was all just a fluke. Starring wordlessly at the melting candles Alyssa waited just a little while before finally setting out to leave. She had to make it back to her apartment—and probably drink herself to sleep. Right as she was about to get up—Alyssa felt a shadow loom over her—and looking up, she saw the face of a handsome man—with rough cheekbones, politely smiling down at her—asking her if she was alright. The first intial reaction was for her guards to shoot up and breakaway from the man—but judging by the look on his face—he didn’t look too peachy. In fact, his face contained the same amount of sadness that she had in her own—Alyssa wondered whether he too was heartbroken—angry and possibly confused. Allowing herself to relax a little, she subconsciously tucked a stray hair behind her ear—staring up at him. “I am sorry—I should probably get going—“ Alyssa stood up—quite hastily, now that someone was here—probably grieving themselves, Alyssa couldn’t stand to ruin that for someone. Giving him a polite smile, she turned her figure and made to leave—but stopping to look at him once again—something just made her turn back around to give him a sparing glance.

MUSE: GARRETT
WORD COUNT: 1312
LISTENING TO: CLOSER TO LOVE - MAT KEARNEY
CREDITS: LYRICS FROM FINE AGAIN BY SEETHER; TEMPLATE BY EMMA.

[/blockquote][/blockquote]

[Garrett Reynolds]

In the beauty of the church, here was an opportunity that raised from the deep depths of the wintery day. For life was very peculiar, here he was coming to the church pretty much every day since Elizabeth's death and not once was there a face that he could mingle with. Now here sat a woman with a look on her features that portrayed a deep sadness, maybe it was fate that Garrett walked into this church at this time of day but whatever it was he wasn't going to let her go because he was grieving, at some point in his life he had to move on from the sadness. In an instant his brown eyes watched her stand up and start to leave as she muttered some apology, as she turned to leave.

Yet something stopped her, briskly standing up in the pew Garrett spoke softly, "You can stay, could use some company, unless you are in a rush to go somewhere but I don't think the weather is going to get any better." Smiling softly at the girl, he sat back down and patted the seat next to him. "The name is Garrett Reynolds, and please sit back down, if you want your privacy I can move further down the pew." Than his eyes shifted back to the front of the church, taking a deep breath in and closing eyes, he prayed silently with his head bowed. Life was a tumbling set of foreseen events, nothing was taken for granted, it would shift at a high rate of speed, and the sands of time settled into a particular pattern. Lifting his head back up, he opened his eyes and let his thoughts run off as he waited to see what the girl would do

Even after he left Norah there really was no point of finding a new girlfriend. They dated just over a year up until this past summer, when Garrett brought Norah to the family reunion out by the lake. Unfortunatly for Garrett, his half-brother Sullivan was there,the guy with all the charm and wits. Some how down the line, Sullivan got dared to sleep with Norah, and when they met well there was denying the chemistry they had together. At that point, Garrett just let her go for even though he was in love there was no point of holding on when the other party was no longer in it.

Sitting here in the church, Garrett once again looked over at the girl,noting how her brown hair fell off her face and just the natural beauty of her would make her a perfect character in his new book. Placing his hands on the pew in front of him, he just started talking once again. "You know it is amazing how a church can be suited best when there is suffering in your life and you are looking for a sign or maybe a place to escape all the horrors of your life." Garrett now just waited to see if the woman beside him would sit or just leave into the wintery landscape outside.

[Alyssa Compton]

I AM AWARE NOW, HOW EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE FINE

[/FONT][/SIZE]

too late, i am in hell[/CENTER]
Sometimes life was so strange; for one moment you find yourself asking for something or seeking it and then—the next moment something comes along your way. Superstition was not something Alyssa believed in, in fact, she found the whole idea a bit of a joke, but standing here frozen in front of his dark haired man—she wondered if he was her sign—whether spending just a few moments talking to him would help make her life changing decision. Unlike most of the men she knew—he didn’t look like the type to have bad intentions, in fact, if truth be told—he looked tragically handsome sitting against the row all alone—like her in a way. Stopping as he heard his voice call back to her, she turned fully to face him—taking in his appearance. He was taller than her—perhaps a few inches shorter than Nikos—but Nikos had always towered over her—just the thought of husband—pierced her heart again—this pain was so unbearable—it seemed as if it was weighing down upon her chest at every odd movement that she made.

Letting out a breath and pushing all those unwanted images of Nikos out of her brain—she kept her eyes locked with the strangers, a forced smile making its way toward her face. Maybe she just needed someone to talk to—no matter if this someone happened to be a stranger—just maybe he was the sign she was looking for. Perhaps these two strangers would share their deepest sorrows together, just for one moment and allow themselves to forget every single horrible thing that has happened to them. Raising her head and smiling slightly, she slowly allowed herself to sit back down. If the situation wasn’t strange enough as it is—he seemed to mention something about looking for signs, which was probably the reason Alyssa was so intrigued. There was something about the depths of his brown eyes that made her feel comforted, just a tiny little bit. Nothing had the power to take away her deepest sorrows—but this little bit of comfort was better than nothing.

She stared at him silently as he bowed his head and preyed, and Alyssa wondered whether this man was religious—it wouldn’t fit him if he was—because he certainly didn’t look religious. Settling herself down beside him and feeling a trace of warmth radiating from him—she scooted away—not wanting to feel him like that—it felt to intimate sitting next to a man and feeling his warmth—a part of her wanted to back at her own house, cuddled up next to Nikos, feeling his warmth and kisses and love—but here she was, in a different city, sitting next to some stranger at a church. It was funny how strange life was—letting out another breath—she relaxed her pose and sat back—wondering if she should talk or not—it wasn’t as if this man was planning to hurt her in any way. Pushing her hair back behind her ear she bit her lip as she looked up at him—wondering what she should say—“You’ve had a tragic falling too, huh?”

It wasn’t polite to prod that deeply into someone’s personal life, especially after a few seconds after meeting them. Most people started off with introductions that involved the exchanging of names, but it seemed as if the depression that was eating away at Alyssa’s heart was making her forget the lifelong manners she had received growing up. Grimacing as the sentence left her mouth—she offered an apologetic look before mumbling another apology. Clearly talking to strangers wasn’t an everyday task she allowed herself to maintain. Coughing slightly; whether it was from the harsh cold outside or perhaps just to clear her throat, she tried the chance at speaking once again. “I am Alyssa—Alyssa Farr—Compton.” A knot was forming at the pit of her stomach as she purposefully stopped herself from saying Farris, instead she called herself by her old surname. It almost tore her to pieces cutting Nikos’ name off of hers—almost as if she was cutting him away—string by string—until nothing of Nikos remained buried in her anymore.

Her eyes became wet again—and she wondered whether or not this stranger would notice and think of her as a stupid woman—crying out her sorrows in church—but didn’t everyone do that? Why couldn’t she be just like everyone else? Because that’s how her life was at the moment—there was nothing special about it—she too was as broken and shattered as the rest of the heartbroken were—she was nothing more than everyone else; as common and standard as she could be. Her right fist clenching against her side, she closed her eyes once again, before mentally counting to ten in her head—before coming her eyes again, trying to make polite conversation with this man before getting up and leaving. It had been years since she had been back in her hometown and really—she had no idea where she even parked her car—let alone how to get there; so possibly an hour or two would be wasted on that.

But no matter how urgent it was—Alyssa stopped herself from leaving abruptly—instead she stayed routed to her seat—thinking about the shambles that her life had become over night—the horrible things she had to witness in front of her eyes—just the horror of everything. Letting out a tired breath, she spoke once again—“Well, what brings you to church on a horrible day like this.” The weather was possibly one of the coldest days ever—even the homeless were safely stored away in shelters—yet here they were two strangers, sitting next to each other—and just for one moment enjoying the bliss that the comforting light of the church brought. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad—maybe everything would work out just fine—all Alyssa had to do was keep faith.

MUSE: GARRETT
WORD COUNT: 1312
LISTENING TO: CLOSER TO LOVE - MAT KEARNEY
CREDITS: LYRICS FROM FINE AGAIN BY SEETHER; TEMPLATE BY EMMA.

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[Garrett Reynolds]

There was a faint draft blowing in from some unknow location making Garrett shiver lightly, or maybe it was that the girl next to him that sat down exposing a heat that he hadn't felt for what seems like years. Quickly she moved away, which made his eyes draw up to hers and he slightly smirked when she asked if he had a tragic falling out as well. "You can say that." Laughing faintly, he just smiled at her and watched as the girl introduced herself as she stumbled upon her last name. Which whether or not she knew it, spilled alot of details to why she was her, for it seemed as if she was looking for an answer to some matter deeper than any stranger would care to know. Yet the tears that streamed down her face in a cascading motion was just heart wrenching, seeing her hand fall down to her side and go into a fist. Garrett reached over and placed his hand over hers, letting his warmth travel onto her as he could feel a coldness drifting off her skin. Suddenly he felt something linger over him, it was a feeling that whatever the decision she was worrying about was actually a good decision and with this mental note he squeezed his hand over hers. "You know whatever decision you are conterplating in that head of yours, it is the right one...no one deserves to be hurt more."

Shifting in his seat, Garrett made a point that he wasn't going to be moving anytime soon. For there was something magical in this church or maybe it was the company that sat next to him. Listening to her question, he took a deep breath in and turned his head towards letting his dark eyes met up with hers. "My sister brought me here and everyday for the past two weeks I have come here. Whether there is sun or snow, guess it brings me a sense of reality, that even though she died--I am still alive." Stopping for a second he looked over at her, "What about you? Has to be something other than getting out of the snow and the weather." Garrett said with a faint smile touching the corners of his lips.

The candles wickered faintly in the distance as the day seemed to be drawing to a close, yet this didn't bother Garret. For he was in no rush to get home and having to shovel out his drive way. Probably start a hot pot of coffee and sit in front of his laptop for hours waiting for something to appear on the screen until his eyes started screaming at him. At that point he would climb to the shower and turn the hot water on, just to stand there for thirty minutes, and than get out. Usually lately, he laid in his bed thinking and pondering, about everything that unraveled for Elizabeth was young and didn't deserve anything that was handed to her. Eventually he would pass out from exhaustion, just to wake up the next day to start the same routine all over again. Taking a deep breath in, he look at Alyssa's face and it seemed to warm a portion of him, for she was just someone to talk to and carry a friendly conversation with.

[Alyssa Compton]

I AM AWARE NOW, HOW EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE FINE

[/FONT][/SIZE]

too late, i am in hell[/CENTER]
The harmonious melody of the stringing piano or maybe the pulls of the violin—they both parallelled the song of her soul. Having the ability to both cause pain and great comfort—perhaps the music had been a time line of her life, and as each day passed she was living out a symphony of her life, playing along with the musical notes of her very own orchestra. This was a tragic note for her—maybe the melody will get better as the tune progressed, yet that was never a certainity. Alyssa hadn’t lived out her life already to know what will become of her—they said that everyone has their own destinies, and everything that happens in life, always happens for the good. Yet—where was the good in this situation—there was nothing good about being alone—nothing at all, just thinking about it made her sick to her stomach.

It wasn’t that she was afraid of living by herself or anything like that—but being with someone for ten years—having their presence surround you for so long, then—all of the sudden, losing every single comfort they offered you—as well as their presence, wasn’t something that one could adjust to lightly. Add that to the fact that Alyssa hardly knew anyone here, besides her mom. Alone in a new city—with no Nikos by her side—it was just horrible to imagine. Maybe if she tried hard enough she could forget the horrible images that the demon woman put in her head; but what she had seen with her own two eyes—how could she allow herself to forget the way he was holding her—how he kissed her—right while she was standing there—watching with a horrified look of tragic lost.

There was no apology in his eyes—nothing, just a wave of embrassesment—the fact that he had a cheap woman throwing herself at him—seemed to—her forehead furrowed and her fists held on harder to the wooden seat as the memories played in her head. They seemed to be daggering away at her heart—making this horrible pain spread through her. How could he? No matter how many times she had tried to replay it in her mind—she had no answers. Was she really that bad---? What had she been doing wrong in their marriage to see such a day? Alyssa could have never dreamed about doing that to him—yet, he had done it so effortlessly—even in front of her—without any sense of shame or displeasure. He was a sick bastard covered in the horrors of lust—befuddled by an equally disgusting woman—if anything—monsters like that deserved each other.

Bitter. Yes, she knew completely well that her thoughts were bitter—in fact she could probably taste them agaisnt her tongue. Alyssa had every single reason to be bitter and more—but what would she accomplish by doing so—wishing bad upon her husband and his mistress wouldn’t do anything to them—in fact—knowing her luck—her wishes would only make them grow that much closer to each other. Just the thought hurt her—for she couldn’t see herself ever loving anyone but Nikos—she had truly believed him to be her soulmate, and it seemed as if fate had other plans in mind. Sometimes she just wanted to figure out why life made these drastic changes—just why we find ourselves drawn to these horrible espects of life and drown ourselves in its miseries. Heartbreak is possibly the most hardest thing to cope with—especially if it was one of her magnitude, and right now—she just wanted someone to lean on.

All this weight that she was carrying was wearing her down—she couldn’t stand it anymore—just for one moment she would like someone to just lift every single burdan she was carrying inside her. Just for one moment she wanted to feel normal—feel free. Yet, that was such a hopeless need—she could never feel truly happy anymore—perhaps a fake smile would break through her face every now and then—but other than that—nothing. Nothing would truly make her happy—the thing that did—would possibly be leaving her life for good. It was time to probably head back home—and probably look for her car in the dark streets of Chicago; the sun had probably set already—but—she had to go home sooner or later right? She couldn’t aviod reality for too long—for then she would revolve around a world which she would create herself—and Alyssa had no desire to be one of those women. She just needed—she just wanted the courage to move on or work to take him back; Alyssa didn’t think she had enough strength to do neither.

It took her a while to break out of her thoughts—maybe it was the presence stilling next to her—or maybe the ringing sound of his deep voice that broke her out of her reviere—inclinging her head she looked at his direction—feeling the warmth of his hand press against her closed fist. Her first intial reaction was to quickly jerk her hand out of his—but—as a few seconds passed—Alyssa noted just how good his hand felt. With just a little touch of comfort—Alyssa could feel all the weight lifting from her shoulders—and she just stared at him—blankly, wondering what he had done. As soon as she was about to ask the question—he spoke again interuppting her—his voice deep as he told her that whatever decision she was making was right—and she didn’t need anymore heartbreak. The fact that there was something very off about him knowing anything about her decision making—and what was more off was the fact that—he seemed to be telling her what she was about to do was right. Frowning, Alyssa looked up at him—befuffled completely.

“How did you--?” Before the question could properly escape her lips—he began to tell her about his sister—and why he came here everyday. The momentary burst of confusion left her—and instead she found heart going out to him. Both had suffered greatly—Alyssa just hadn’t expected to run into someone with the same amount of suffering as her—it was odd indeed, but no matter—the thought still comforted her to no end. Allowing his hand to rest on top of her own smiled softly at him—knowing full well that nothing would comfort him. He had lost something incredibly important in his life and nothing takes away that void from anyone. Sighing a bit to herself—she didn’t really know what to say—besides utter a mimble apology. “I am sorry—I am sure you must have loved her dearly—still do. We can’t truly ever forget our loved ones.” There was more in that sentence that she liked to admit—knowing full well that she was talking about herself as much as she was talking about him—but he didn’t need to know that—after all, they were strangers, weren’t they?

MUSE: GARRETT
WORD COUNT: 1314
LISTENING TO: CLOSER TO LOVE - MAT KEARNEY
CREDITS: LYRICS FROM FINE AGAIN BY SEETHER; TEMPLATE BY EMMA.

[/blockquote][/blockquote]

[Garrett Reynolds]

The serenity Garrett felt sitting there next to Alyssa was something he didn't feel often, it was as if both of them needed a calling and a sign of something. Feeling there hands touch, he slowly interwined his fingers with hers, as the gaps were filled and it seemed as if the coldness drifted away suddenly. As there palms touched, a slow smile crept upon his face as she made a comment about losing there loved ones. That was the truth though, once someone left your life, that was that. There was no turning back, all you have to hold onto is the memories which made the sorrow grow deeper. Rubbing his thumb along the back of her hand in a movement that seemed all to natural, he just watched her features.

"Sorrow is not something I like dealing with, yet this year it seems as if just comes popping up. So, Alyssa, what brings you here to this church? For it seems as if sorrow has definatly dealt you a big blow." His was deep and soft, as he just watched her with his brown eyes lingering against hers. Shifting lightly in his seat, he turned his attention back to the front of the church as memories of the past flooded in.

About a year ago, his parents renewed there vows at this same church and even sat in the same pew as this one. Yet there was a different girl on his arm, Norah Robinson. The brown-haired bombshell that managed to take his breath away with one kiss and a look into her bright eyes just warmed his soul. For he managed to fall in love completly, to this day he wondered whether or not if she felt the same way. Gritting his teeth, he pushed his memories further on into that day when he had a dance with his sister at the grand dance hall in downtown Chicago. The way there bodies drifted along the dance floor as easy laughter filtered past there ears and echoed through the building. Moments like these made there parents smile, even if Elizabeth was several years younger than him, she had so much to offer to the world. The bright cheery smile, the flowing brown hair and the dark eyes that managed to reflect the world. Perhaps becoming one of the best doctors in the world as she studied at NYU and worked at the local hospital. Shaking his head, he toke a deep breath, which managed to wash away the memories, at least for now. As he managed to focus at where he was, and there was actually someone by him.

Turning his head in her direction, he spoke once again for he figured both of them could use a distraction at this present time. "So how long have you lived in Chicago?" Once again his thumb started moving against the back of her hand, and his other fingers gently played against her hand, the movements seemed so natural. For some reason they were meant to be in this church sitting here at the same time. The answer may not come but at least there was comfort knowing someone else shared as much grief as him.

[Alyssa Compton]

I AM AWARE NOW, HOW EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE FINE

[/FONT][/SIZE]

too late, i am in hell[/CENTER]
It was almost as if a haze of smoke had befallen upon the depths of her life and no matter what direction she forced herself to turn to, everything dramatically led to a dead-end. Nothing was a certainty anymore, everything was just at a slow deep standstill and Alyssa didn’t have the strength in her to move forward. Sighing a bit to herself, her mind drifted back towards her mum, who would no doubt nag at her and prod her with uncomfortable questions about where she had been and all of that. Most of the time she had gotten along with her mum, but sometimes the woman was just unbearable, especially now. Her mother seemed to think that her life falling apart was just another calling to start a new one, if only it could be that easy—if only it was so easy to get away from life and build a new one. It wasn’t as if she didn’t have any resources—she just didn’t have the strength to cope with anything once it falls apart again. How many times did one person have to face rejection until it finally seeps inside their head? Turning her head in the direction of the high arched windows she studied them—the earlier grief that had been ebbing away at her heart was slowly fading away--- turning into a different grief.

There was this aura passing inside her that suggested that something was off—she could feel something intermingling with her own—it didn’t feel intrusive—but it was familiar. Alyssa had always gotten these little mood changes—but for some reason—they didn’t affect her, she only felt them—if that made any sense. Her shoulders stiffing a bit—she felt the tight bond in her hand loosen and felt these warm fingers intertwine with her own. A wave of warmth she knew nothing about passed through her—showering her with a feeling that she wasn’t familiar with. It wasn’t bad—it was undoubtedly on the good side, but Alyssa didn’t know what it was. She wanted to face Garrett once more and wonder why two strangers had their hands intertwined in a church—but she couldn’t force the words to leave her lips when she turned to look at him, in fact—the moment she turned her head in his direction, her eyes landed on his—and just for a brief moment, she couldn’t allow herself to look away—they were oddly amazing.

A few seconds had passed or perhaps it was hours—but finally she managed to break away from those deep brown eyes of his—it seemed to take her forever but she managed—biting her lip slightly, she wondered if she ought to move the hand that was intertwined against hers—but it seemed as if her own nerves weren’t letting her. Sighing—she listened to his soft voice, the way that he spoke—it seemed to lull her—move inside of her and as much as this was terrifying her—for now she let the strangeness occur. Alyssa had gone out today—to finalize everything, so when she went back to New York to slap Nikos with divorce papers—everything would go smoothly. She had neither expected to take a walk in the frosty Chicago streets nor did she expect to come into a church and hold hands with a randomly handsome man who seemed to come out of nowhere.

They sat there—with him asking her questions about her troubles and Alyssa wondered what she should say—it wasn’t like her to open up to strangers—but then again, normally she didn’t hold hands with strangers either—something about the whole situation made her feel more wary and uncomfortable—yet so at peace at the same time. It was odd feeling conflictions of this sorts—she had never felt it before. Inclining her head slightly at him at his question—Alyssa pondered it greatly, before truly wondering where she ought to begin—for a story like this really had no beginning—only ends. “Truthfully—I think it’s life cruel destiny that brings me here to this church.” Alyssa said nothing more on the subject—it would be on him to take her answer however way he pleased, she just couldn’t relive any single memory of Nikos—it would be too hard—way too hard to think about him—especially now; that she had finally acquired some kind of peace, no matter how temporary it was.

“Just moved to Chicago actually—will be living here, for now. If things work out with---" Alyssa didn’t finish—again the sentence was torn from her lips—but this time it wasn’t mixed emotions stopping her—it was a vibration along her hip—and a horrid love song—that she couldn’t bare to listen to anymore. Closer to Love, she had it back when she was still a happy wife in New York—moving here, Alyssa just didn’t have time to delete anything that reminded her of Nikos—grimacing, she pulled her cell phone out of its case—and opened it—which caused her to grimace even further. It was a missed call from her mum—and Alyssa didn’t know whether or not she wanted to actually call her back—sighing, she dialed the number with her thumb—yet—when she pressed call—the service seemed to have died—letting out a sigh—she closed her phone, her eyes catching the time at flashed at her. It was almost nine—fuck, she hadn’t noticed that she had been out this long—turning back toward Garrett once more—her eyes took its time gazing at him—before she pulled herself together. “It’s late, I should probably get going—and possibly and try to find my car.” The last bit had been for her own ears—but nonetheless—Alyssa made to stand up—she guessed this was goodbye.

MUSE: GARRETT
WORD COUNT: 1117
LISTENING TO: CLOSER TO LOVE - MAT KEARNEY
CREDITS: LYRICS FROM FINE AGAIN BY SEETHER; TEMPLATE BY EMMA.

[/blockquote][/blockquote]

[Garrett Reynolds]

Once again a natural fog rolled over the two strangers, who seemed to have so much in common. Which seemed very unnatural considering the facts of where they were, probably both of them came from a lifestyle full of sinners and liars, now be beckoned in the site of a church but neither were the actually sinners. The path of which was scorned and hallowed out in there hearts was caused by hatred and sadness blended into one. Garrett knew the feelings of guilt, sadness, hatred, and disbelieve all to well, for it seemed to surround him for the past several weeks. Now as he sat next to Alyssa he felt serenity, like a fog of true bliss surrounded him and just wrapped there arms around him as they held hands. Perhaps under any other circumstance this setting would look odd but if someone stumbled upon them. There was something peculair in the air but nothing seemed to break it yet.

Within seconds her phone rang and Garrett could hear the ring tone after she pronounced that she was only living in Chicago for now. Still grasping her hand, he watched her react to the name on the phone and possibly the time, as she started to stand up talking about how she lost her car. Making a move with her, Garrett spoke. "Why don't I help you, for I am not in rush to anywhere and I am Chicago Native. Besides the weather isn't pretty outside for you to go wondering all alone and you don't know who you are going to run into." Lifting his coat with his free hand, he handed it over to Alyssa, and once again spoke softly "Why not borrow my coat, and once we find your car you can give it back." His brown eyes mingled deeply with her own as he just watched her.

[Alyssa Compton]

I AM AWARE NOW, HOW EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE FINE

[/FONT][/SIZE]

too late, i am in hell[/CENTER]
Something about this city was making it’s way inside her, even though she had only been here for only three days, she had grown quite used to enjoying the laid back culture that Chicago presented itself to be. Living in New York was amazing actually—but, it was always hectic. No one stopped to offer smiles, no one helped one another—unless it was deemed evident. Basically everyone minded their own business—it was every man for themselves. This place however was nicer—for example, if this was just another old chruch in New York City—Alyssa didn’t think anyone would just invade into someone’s space like this. But—no matter what she said, this man wasn’t invading; Alyssa herself had looked for an excuse, something to call out to her and save her from her misery—let her mind focus on anything else, but Nikos. Maybe, Garrett was that escape—just for one moment, she could just talk to another being—share and part with their grief.

Alyssa didn’t think she would ever see him again, in her eyes he was just another stranger among the large city that Chicago was, after this day he would be just another face among the mass and she would never see him again. So why can’t she just allow herself to pour of all of her frustrations upon one being for now? But alas, it was just too much to relive the wounds that had befalled upon her during the past few weeks. For now, she just wanted to forget—no have anyone treating her like a porcilin doll. Letting out a soft sigh, she smiled softly at Garrett and made to stood up—but felt something tug her back nonetheless. A small frown crossing her face, she followed the light tug—and saw to her surprise that her hands were interwined with his own. For a moment, she just stared at this sight—wondering why two strangers were holding hands—she could feel the rough calloused fingers on her skin now—and she thought how amazing it was to have human contact—and just as the thought entered her head—Alyssa pulled back quickly—looking quite horrified at her direction of thoughts.

Feeling the warmth leave her hands she bit her lip—looking a bit flustered. Taking a few short breaths, she allowed herself to calm down—because really, it wasn’t a big deal—but to her it was. It almost felt like she was cheating—she was a married woman—still. She had no right to be holding hands with a complete stranger and liking it, no matter what Nikos had done to her, it did not mean that she would do the same or even think of doing the same. Alyssa was a more morally inept person than he was—always had been; sometimes she wondered why she married him. Yes, she had been in love—but everyone she was close to had warned her—her mother mostly—but Alyssa never listened. She tossed away the words of everyone that she loved or loved her—to marry a man who had tossed her away for a whore. Again, Alyssa had allowed those unpleasant thoughts to creep inside her.

It was funny how the moment her hands parted from Garrett’s, the memories came back—at full force. Everything was attacking her—the serenity that she felt—was all but gone and once again Alyssa felt as miserable as she had done when she had came in. She let out a sigh—life was just amazing sometimes. Bending down slightly, she picked up her purse, which she had laid it next to her before she sat down, and picking it back up, she held it against her, probably something to cling on when the coldness struck again. She turned around one last time to face him, smiling—a true smile at her wake—“Well, I guess this is goodby—“ Alyssa didn’t get the chance to finish her sentence, instead—he spoke, startling her—but making her smile more wider nonetheless. Truth be told, she really had no wish to go out all on her own—and perhaps with a Chicago native, they would find her car quicker. Nodding her head—she continued to smile. “Thank you,” she whispered softly. “That’s really nice of you,” she hadn’t expected the offer, but apreciated it—very much so.

As she turned toward the door and began to walk—something stoppedher again, and facing him once more she noted that he took off his jacket and pushed it towards her. Alyssa couldn’t help but laugh, “No need, I have my own.” Nice, it was to see that some men still had this decency called respect—she hardly saw it. Sighing she waited for him to step by her side, so they could walk out together—it was nice to have someone to walk with—maybe the harshness of the cold wouldn’t be as apparent.

MUSE: GARRETT
WORD COUNT: 944
LISTENING TO: CLOSER TO LOVE - MAT KEARNEY
CREDITS: LYRICS FROM FINE AGAIN BY SEETHER; TEMPLATE BY EMMA.

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